I know I do it to myself, and I brought it upon myself, but I broke my heart again. I found out yesterday that he "returned" the ring. I was going to offer to buy it to take it off his hands, so that I could have a memento... but I found out he returned it. So, me being the silly girl I am... I was devastated. To me, as long as that ring existed, as long as he kept it, there was a chance that he really meant it when he proposed. However, now that he took the ring back, he took everything back. He took back the promise he made and the love he supposedly had for me. He took it back. I feel like an 8-year old and want to scream "no take backs!"
I just kept repeating to myself... he took it back, he took it back. He took it back. I am so jealous that he could just "take back" all those promises and all those feelings. That he could "return" it and now it never happened.
It is good though, because now it shows me that I was holding on to nothing, especially since he lied to me a couple months ago when I asked him if he ever took the ring back. He didn't tell me then, when we were trying to work things out... that he had already "taken it back" and he wasn't holding on to any promise.
That is me, the naive girl... the one who hopes until there is no hope left. Maybe now, this is enough proof that there is no hope.
