You are worth somone who CAN'T wait!

The bible: "He's just not that into you" by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo
Chapter 7: he's just not that into you if he doesn't want to marry you

I am actually quite proud of myself. I read this book over two years ago and it helped me get myself on track then and it still rings true today. Actually, my break-up was a lot easier this time around. I know the posts to my blog may make it seem different, but it is true. I didn't take to heavy partying, drinking, one night stands, and other self-destructive behaviors this time. I do think of him constantly, but I don't desperately call, email, or put myself in situations where I "might" run into him. Why, because of chapter 7 in this book.

The night we broke up he told me that while on vacation with his parents his dad got a little tipsy and asked if we were going to get married, he didn't tell me his answer that night, but... I have since guessed it since that was the beginning of the end. I know that his response was, "I don't think so." Not, "maybe" or "I don't know," but a realization for him that he just wasn't that into me. Now he tried to feed me what Greg calls, "The Age-Old 'I'm Just Not Ready' Excuse." I was proud of myself that night because I said, you will end up with someone, I am just really sad that it isn't going to be me.

Now I have to thank my former guy because he did what I couldn't and walked away, I would have waited and been one of those girls... but since he walked away, I was also able too. And though I am not happy, I am not entirely sad either, because if my love was a burden or wasn't what he was looking for, he doesn't deserve me and I will find someone who wants me. Someone who can't wait to talk to me everyday. Someone who will call just because he is thinking of me. Someone who will buy me flowers for no reason at all. Someone who will work as hard as I will to make things work.

Greg writes in his book:

"Dear Waiting at the Altar,
He's right. Why rush? It's only been five years. He's going to know you so much better after ten years he decides he's still not ready. I hate to tell you this, but here's why he feels rushed: He's still not sure you're the one. Yep my lovely, I know it's hard to hear, but better to hear it now than 10 years from now..."

Remember this... you are worth someone who CAN'T wait!

Setting my sights on a prince

Just in case you hadn't read yet, Prince William split from his long-time girlfriend at least according to the tabloids and British papers. That means he is available again ladies. I guess I will wait four weeks and then move in. Do you think that is long enough? ;-)

I am single!

The phone rings, I have email, and plans for Saturday night. It always amazes me how the instant you become single, guys who you haven't spoken to in months are suddenly very attentive. Do girls give of a scent or something that says, "Here I am, I am free again. You weren't able to get with me then but now is your chance, let the games begin."

I guess I don't give the "right" guys enough credit or I definitely play this game all wrong by betting on the wrong ones. And guys wonder why girls go after the bad boys, or at least were at one time a "bad boy." It is because going with the nice guy, the good guy, is the bigger gamble. You go in hoping, wanting, thinking, and feeling like this is the one, only to learn they haven't lived enough life to make that decision. Dating the "bad boy" upfront means you expect absolutely nothing but maybe a few dates, some decent sex, and only as much work as you put into it. You don't ever have expectations so when it is a few days, weeks, months down the road, you say, "Wow! I didn't expect this to last this long. Oh well, it is fun." And make sure it stays that way. Nice guys don't know how to make sure things remain just for fun... they confuse the issue and then confuse the girl.

Every girl is looking for commitment if she is in any kind of relationship. She is looking for commitment to the relationship that your supposed to have with that kind of person. It is when that person doesn't want that role that things go wrong. Bad boys are flings, nice guys are LTR, hot guys are arm jewelry and eye candy, nerds are for intellectual stimulation, the one-night stand is strictly for sex. Girls are just like guys. You know there are those girls you would take home for the night, the girls you would hang out with, the girl you take home to mom and dad, and the girls you run and hide from. So my advice, have fun while your young with the bad boys. Wait for the nice guy to come to you, so you are certain he is invested. Hot guys are nice for a weekend in Vegas or to make your friends jealous. Nerds are great and should never be ruled out!